Monk of Monotony, Dust In The Sin, Reaping The Wreckage

Kerry King = Hippie Holocaust

Autumn is in the air, and perhaps it is the organic matter beginning to decay or the recent increase in precipitation, but I have been in a pretty decent mood the past few days. First of all, my nephew Jack Atlas Meier was born at 7:45 a.m. on October 8th at 7lbs 8oz. So that was super duper awesome. It's crazy holding a human being that was inside someone just a few hours earlier. My brother and sister-in-law are tired as fuck but seemed to be doing dandy nonetheless. And it is strange to realize that there is now a generation between you and the abyss of progress. I went from being a middle child, to being an uncle in just a short 9 months. And now I have to get to work on making him a vegan straight edge warrior. Luckily I would break into my brother's apartment every night for the past 9 months and would play Earth Crisis through headphones around his wife's tummy. Needless to say, that kid will be "A Firestorm To Purify!!!!" But also yesterday was the birthday of some pretty neat people. It was John Lennon's birthday and over the years I have accepted that he was the King of the Hippies, but I still think he was a great man whom I wished hadn't had to meet his end the way he did. But it was also one of my co-worker's birthday who has been slaying upon the Earth for many moons now and it felt good to make his birthday somewhat cool even though he was at work. I remember becoming a cook on my 16th birthday, and look at me now! ...Wait...shit...my life is boring and stupid...fuck... Anywho! Though I wish pestilence and famine on most of the mouth-breathers this cesspool called "Life" congeals on the daily, it has felt good to take a short sabbatical from hating everything and everyone for once.

The key to self liberation!!!

One of Chumm's few shows ended
in such an awesome way.
Like that Elton John song says,
"Our giant inverted cross burned
out long before our legend ever did."

But enough of that posi-shit!! Let's talk about The Gloom!! THE GLOOOOOOMMMM!!!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! As I mentioned earlier, Autumn is a time of rebirth and reflection for your's truly. I never realize it until I am in the grips of it, but I do the majority of my music writing and playing in the Fall months. Almost any band I have ever played with we wrote our best stuff and played our best shows around this time of year. My first real band Cult of Reason would play basement shows all the time over on Richard Terrace St. Procession wrote "Spring Thaw" in the frigid unheated depths of The Cage one Autumn's eve. And I wrote the majority of my gloom songs for Longing in the dark embrace of my room towards the end of October and early November a few years back. My old vegan straight edge hardcore band played our first show November 1st of 2010 I believe. Boy that sent us tumbling down the old rabbit hole I tell you what my interesting sailor friends. And who could forget the faithless night that Chumm played Fowlerville? Hell swam to the High Heavens that night. And our tour van "The Red Dragon" took a shit on the way home. Fuck, hard to believe how long ago all those times were. My ass is getting nostalgic as shit right now. Good Times 

Back to the gloom. As I have mentioned a few times in this blog, I have been trying to get a drum and bass project off the ground called RUINED for a little while now. A lot of barriers have been in the way and my general problem of having my spirit crushed by yuppies every waking moment of my life. But with the power of Autumn and astonishingly dreadful rainy days, I have been trying to push through and start getting material together for recording a release. As of right now I have plans for two upcoming releases, one being a two song EP or possible LP depending on how carried away I get with the shoegaze drone. And the other release is a split I am planning on doing with one of my oldest and most cherished friends. Without "Ruining" too many surprises, I am really excited about doing that split and have many cool ideas for making the physical copies we distribute to be unique and fun to create. Without getting too carried away with the creativity of the packaging. (See the final paragraph of a previous post HERE for my thoughts on the shit-squeezing obsession of "D.I.Y." music distribution.)  But I think it will be fun for any Gloom Gurus who pick up the record to know that a lot of care and work went into their purchase. As always though, I have no idea when I will begin recording for these endeavors. It will probably end up being a rainy day, an 8-Track and will just be done fucking live probably. Who knows. I am a broke ass with little access to even decent recording equipment. But hey, no one's perfect. 

Been loving Jesu again lately.

Wheel Wars, Life Is A Near Death Experience, Ginger Ale-ienation

This is also kind of how Monte reacts
when we get heavy.

Longing played our first show in a long time last night. The journey there was fucking dumb, it was the 2nd or 3rd time I have had to change a tire on my way to or from Kalamazoo. It started making a noise and so I thought "I'll get off at the next exit and check it out." Then it started shaking the car just a little bit and I decided to pull over and look to be safe and found a smoldering pile of wire and tar. I couldn't believe how bad it was without being more noticeable. It's as if Newman got caught in the wheel well after that Dilophosaurus spit toxic sludge on him in Jurassic Park. So I knelt down in the rain putting a spare on while semi-trucks almost clipped me. But I made it there eventually and was surprised by the turn out. We played really well actually and it made me excited to try and stay motivated with that band. That band is really something special to me. It's different from most bands I have been in where you have to practice so much to make the live performance even decent to watch. I still think the more you practice the better off you will be, but we just sort of get carried away in the storm and just do what we do best. I am hoping to do some recording in the not too distant future and go from there. The future looks gloomy for Longing, which of course means "coo." All in all I guess it was worth missing Henry Rollins last night. I will always have that $23 piece of paper to remind me of a great night where I played a show instead of seeing Henry Rollins. I'm sure he'd understand.

That shit ain't vegan.

Unfortunately due to the tire fucking up and other reasons I had to leave before I could watch Planning For Burial's set which will forever cause me to wear sorrow and regret upon my face. But Thom was gracious enough to give me one of his EP's and I listened to it 4 times back to back on the drive home. I thought about a lot of things. I thought about if I drove off into the night and was never seen again and whether I would be missed. I sat in amazement at how the most beautiful things are the creation of tortured souls. It also reminded me of how I will never forget the way the white arches of the Mackinaw Bridge looked on the drive home from a camping trip I took with my dad and brother when I was 9. I was so distraught when I got home that my mom cheered me up with a new Winnie the Pooh movie. Which made me recall how the worst moments of my life were always haunted by sunlight creeping through blinds. Blinds will always make me uneasy. Black it all out. But my greatest fear has always been looking inward. I am grateful that I have the courage to look into the abyss of myself. I always grow and learn more about myself every time I do. And I almost pity these people who are addicted to happiness. They will never have the power to inspire nor will they ever hear the siren's call of illumination. Fucking pathetic if you ask me. Willfully mundane, blissfully forlorn.

Gross...

But a side story to all of that is when Thom gave me the EP some shitter with a serious case of "Ginger-Vitis" was standing nearby and interrupted with "Oh those are free? Can I have one?" Firstly, they were not actually free and this shit-whistle was just swooping in and taking advantage of someone's generosity. But he gave the kid one if only to shut him up, but then he just sort of awkwardly tried to be a part of a conversation he was never welcomed into. Do you ever have that happen? Where you are hanging out with a friend and some turd-tarantula walks up and pollutes the air with fruitless ventilation? "Yeah totally...so yeah....beer is cool huh? Yeah...I like beer...you guys like beer? Yeah cool...I wasn't hugged as a child how bout you guys? Yeah...totally..." They just keep going despite it being completely obvious that they are not being received whatsoever. Kerry King help us. People are so fucking dumb. People just need to learn to shut the fuck up more and save the rest of us some oxygen. You don't need to talk all the time and fill the space you occupy with nothingness. No one gives a fuck. Give up, shut up, don't make eye contact and then quietly rot into obscurity. That's my life motto. 

Hard-Ass Soup, The Two Headed Woman and The 6-String Bass, Gloom Totem Pole

You've got two things right now: Jack and Shit,
and Jack just left town.

I saw the 1981 version of "Evil Dead" for the first time last night. (I know I've been fucking up.) I have seen "Army of Darkness" numerous times and they are worlds apart. It does make me curious to see the remake though. Not enough to go pay and see it because I am sure it is shitty in a lot of ways but I did watch a trailer for it earlier and it did look pretty gnarly if you are into gore and shit. And puke gore. And gore being puked into the hole of someone else's gory face filled with pukey gory goo. But Ash will always have a special place in my heart. I think that would be a cool name to have. I would name my kid Ashley Maggot Meier. They would never ever get beat up. Cause I know what it takes to be coo these days. You need to know just a few simple rules to be coo: Do not make eye contact unless you absolutely must, go outside as little as possible and don't talk to anyone ever. Then people will think you are super coo all the time because you are so "exclusive" you see. Yep, that's how that works.

I got to hang out with two of the coolest dudes ever the other day. Master Shredder Graham Henning and Joe "Where's The Fucking Pit?" Moon. For those of you who don't know or live far away in magical lands full of gumdrop forests, Joe and his lovely ladyfriend Sarah just had a baby pit princess named Ramona Wolf Scott-Moon. Isn't that such a cool name? "RAMONA WOLF..." Full of mystery and wonder. I wish I was named Ramona, or Ashley. I think I might go by Ashley now. ASHLEY PIT-WARRIOR. Yep, call me Ashley from now on please. Anywho, I didn't get to meet the little lady but what little positive energy I have will be sent to all of them telepathically. Seems like everyone I know is having babies now, must just getting to be that age. I've said it before time and time again, but Joe and Ryan "Ditch Demon" Brady are the funnest dudes I know and I can't wait to see Bolt Thrower with them and Richard "Tricky Dick" Hackler in June. We'll show that pit how we do in Gun Ru. 

Otherwise, Longing practiced for the last time today before our show on Friday with Planning For Burial. I think it will go pretty well. It is mildly upsetting that our show has to start and end early so that people can get to a better show that was booked down the road. I really hate when that shit happens but Longing has always been a more personal band for me then a band I really desire to share with others. It's more cathartic then it is fun. It's just a different outlet for me then all the other bands I have been involved with. But if any of you are in the Kalamazoo area and feel like getting gloomy by 7 p.m. before Denny's Early Bird Specials run out then feel free to make an appearance. Only mildly related, but I was recently shown this band Agowilt and they are really fucking good. (All accreditation and endorsements are the rights of Butt Abs Inc., a subservient of Tricky Dick Unlimited.) They basically sound a lot like how I would like my band Tristram to sound like. Really fucking heavy but beautiful at the same time. Check them out HERE if you're interested. Speaking of heavy but ugly as shit, it is Paul Gray of Slipknot's birthday today. Though of course he is not with us anymore due to Maggot overdose. As that old Don McLean song goes "This world was never meant for one as Nu as you."

Rest in rot...

Sailing The Seas of Me, Shitty Shitty Bang Bang, This Is A Sad Fucking Song

I just got done working out for the first time in a while. Every time I start working out again it's like I have found the missing piece to my life. I feel way better physically which helps make me feel better emotionally. I also have started eating better and not chronically masturbating. I've said it once and I'll say it again, no one wins with chronic masturbation. You get about 3 to 5 seconds of blissful euphoria, then hours of numbness and a sticky t-shirt. I have been hitting a heavy bag for about 20 minutes and I feel way better beating that thing then Captain Tiny Tickles. I also bought some hand-wraps and I always feel like a fucking badass taking those off. "Yep, just got done shredding Edward Norton's face off, maybe I'll take on Master Shredder next."

Fuck yeah Casey Jones. So fucking coo..,

As you can maybe tell, I am in a much better mood today. I actually slept a reasonable amount and work wasn't too crushing for my spirit. But some people are just never in a good mood. I generally am occupied with thoughts of misanthropy and murder/suicide is my bread and butter. But I think I do a reasonably decent job of not shitting on everyone else's day. 9 times out of 10 if I am in a shitty mood I just avoid people the best I can or just keep to myself. (Which is probably why people never see me outside of work or why I barely talk at work sometimes.) But some people are just fucking shitters. They just shit all over everything all the fucking time. They usually think God is coo too, which is weird since God Hates Us All. I just hate shitters, I hate the happy humpers just as much but shitters are just shitty. Quarantine yourself if you are infected with the shitter virus. Symptoms include: Metamorphosis into a Turd-Goblin, coughing up poop nuggets, and fart sweats. If you see any of these things happening, find the nearest basement, put on the first She and Him record and ignore all other forms of life. You know what would be sweet? If the internet existed, but only 10,000 people lived on the entire planet. All spread out into little pockets thousands of miles apart. And all motorized forms of travel were nonexistent. That way we could still read each other's blogs and other useless shit but we wouldn't have to actually see one another unless we REALLY wanted to. Imagine liking someone enough that you would bike a thousand miles to see them? That would keep shit real genuine. Not like these shitters running around cross breeding making super shitters. Remember the topic is shitters? Okay coo.

Otherwise, I have been feeling a little more creative recently and have been wanting to get back into the world. As far as a music update, Longing is playing a show April 12th (see right flyer.) Not sure what is going to happen after that show. We have some interest in putting something out at least to document what we've done the last 2 years. Pretty much the same story with Tristram. And Procession is up in the air as far as touring goes but we are getting some music done soon. Otherwise, I am going to try jamming with a bud of mine tomorrow. I have no idea where it's going to go musically if anywhere but I know for certain that I am not going to put my chips into anything unless we are going to seriously fuck shit up with no more barriers or excuses. Destroy all face or go the fuck home is my mentality at this point. Also it will probably be a nu metal band. That's basically the only music I give a shit about anymore. Stay Nu. 

The Beginning, When I Grow Up I Want To Be, What We All Learn To Need

Today I'd like to start with a little nostalgia, and a little bit of information so all of you can get to know me a little better. For anyone who doesn't know, I have been playing bass since I was a wee lad back in the potato mines of Conklin at the tender age of 12. The first year of playing I kind of just jerked it around and tried to make some sort of sounds come out of it. I was under the arrogant presumption that if I never learned other musician's songs, then no one could ever tell me I was playing my instrument wrong. Because obviously I am such a fucking coo 12 year old who could re-define an instrument. Anywho, around 13 I decided that's pretty fucking stupid and went off into the woods in search of truth and fun. Now over a decade later, I look back at these times and realize how distinctly they defined me. Can you guess what the first 5 bass-lines I learned were? "MUDSHOVEL" by Staind, "THE RED" by Chevelle, "BURNIN' FOR YOU" by Blue Oyster Cult, "WARNING" by Green Day and "GOTTA GET AWAY" by The Offspring. Now the first 2 make perfect sense, my love and loyalty to Nu Metal has always gone unquestioned by the NuMetalacicon: The Tribunal Inquisition of Maggots. And B.O.C. makes perfect sense since I love dark magic and dad rock. Then there is the pop punk. I fucking love pop punk. I don't listen to that many different bands (Green Day, Offsping, NOFX, Bad Religion and of course I will probably die being shot down by security guards for trying to spoon Mark Hoppus of Blink 182.)  But these bands were the foundation for everything that came after, and gave me the skills I needed to take on my future challenges.

Me In 10 years, if my grades are good enough.

Dad Coat Mini

Now I wish I could fully capture the essence of what I am about to describe to you. The next chapter of my expansion into music was sort of a gift really. A message from the Big Electron. I remember I was starting to use a lot more chords and stuff on my bass and hadn't really seen a lot of bass players doing that sort of thing. So I believe it was the summer before my 16th birthday. I had my computer set up in my mom's living room and I was probably playing World Of Warcraft when my brother walked in. This simple encounter would change my life forever. My brother said, "Hey you should check out this band." He got on my computer and started to play a song. It began with light cymbal hits...my curiosity began to grow. It was pulling me in, my usual instinct to shit on anything my brother likes was dimmed for a moment. I wasn't sure what was going to come, when suddenly it burst through the sonic calm. It was a bass, but it was a weird sounding bass. A bass sent down from Maggot Mountain to shake me from my slumber and scream at me "WAKE THE FUCK UP ZACH!!!!!!!! GRAB YOUR FUCKING BASS AND FUCK EVERYTHING UP!!!!!!!! FUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCKKKKKK!!!!!!" The song my brother played for me on that fateful day, was "Too Many Puppies" by Primus. Even as I type this I want to cry. And how many people do you know who cry because they love Primus so much that they want to carve Primus into their throat? This cowboy. From that day forth I was obsessed with bass. I would play bass 9 hours a day and play WoW at the same time. When I wasn't playing bass, I was thinking about playing bass. I only wanted to be the best I could be to acquire some level of perfection I thought was unreachable. I was most likely well on my way to being the next Victor Wooten or some other wiener like that.

The Later Years

I say wiener, because it wasn't until I was 18 that I finally learned what real music is all about. I was under the delusion that being able to play insanely fast or learning every technique possible was what being a musician was all about. But I can honestly say, if I heard someone playing what I used to play back then, I would fucking hate it. The summer of 2007, I met a young sailor named Monte and I had my first mate Josh ready to steer me into a new and fascinating chasm of my musical development. They showed me the song "Ceremony" by New Order. Probably one of the simplest bass-lines I know, yet it is also one of my favorite bass lines I have crammed into my cerebellum. They showed me that true musicianship is a personal battle between ourselves and the collective consciousness of everyone and everything. Lines are meant to be drawn and shattered over and over again. Constantly moving and shifting from liquid to solid to vapor. To vapor to solid to nothingness. My musical heroes have always been the best of me. From the more well known : Les Claypool, Justin Broadrick, Dan Barrett, Kevin Shields, Mogwai, Airs etc. To the people I have shared the misfortune of being burdened with creative endeavor: Monte Davis Jr, Joshua Robinson, Graham Henning, Britty Drake, Mike Assatly, Richard Hackler, Codi, Gabe Nemecek, Jake "Mr. Shit" Murphy, Dean Robinson, Mario Gambardella, Alastair Fyffe and a shitload more. Though I know I will probably die alone and rot in a ditch someday, I feel as though me life has been enriched by my music and the experiences tied in with that. And though I am certainly not the happiest person ever, I feel that music is one path in life that I know I will never regret. Fuck it, do it live. I guess I started and ended this whole thing with it being about me so sorry about that. I have to go to Longing practice. God Hates Us All. 

Well I Wonder, Nailed To The Static-X, New Longing Song

Do you ever wonder about how you were conceived? Does that ever cross your cerebellum? Do you wonder if your parents were listening to music? And if so, do you wonder what song was playing right at the moment of conception? I wonder about this all the time. I just ponder away at this day and night. Realistically my guess would have to be on Scorpions or Judas Priest. But maybe Thin Lizzy, or Pink Floyd would totally be possible. That would explain my addiction to dad rock. If you're wondering why Jeff Tweedy is next to this is because I Googled "dad rock" and this popped up. Sad but true. Dad rock for life. Jeff Tweedy is coo.

Anywho, I have mentioned it before but I have been building an ever growing nu metal playlist at work and I gotta say it is turning into a fucking masterpiece. Slipknot, Deftones, Kittie, Mudvayne, System of a Down, Deadsy and of course Static-X among others. Primarily the record "Roots" by Sepultura has been rocking my fucking shit so hard. I had somehow forgotten how fucking heavy this record is. I worked out to that record yesterday and it got me so fucking pumped that I ended up eating a baby as a sacrifice to Korn the band and Khorne the God of Blood. (Sorry, I know baby isn't vegan. They all break eventually so fuck it.) Anywho, Sepultura fucking rules and that's about all I give a shit about in this post.

In the Longing camp, I wrote a demo for a new song that I am pretty satisfied with. It needs some Monte magic and Codi crashes but overall I think it's solid. You can check out a demo for it HERE. The song itself is about a day dream I had at work. I was alone in the back most of the day doing prep and washing dishes. And for some reason I got caught imagining a horrible situation and how I would react to it. I imagined being on tour, or in some unfamiliar place and by chance witnessing someone trying to rape another person. I thought about this and how it is one of the few situations where I would completely lose any restraint I could possibly have. I would do horrible things to the attacker, things that I would possibly regret later on no matter how justified I felt. But I would just react and everything in me would create a scene from a horror film. Then I snapped out of it and realized I had just been pacing back and forth on auto-pilot. Even as I type this I am anxious and on guard. But anyways, if you still read this far, sorry that link above didn't go to a Longing demo. I have recently learned to keep things like that to myself until they are finished products. But fuck yeah, Sepultura. That's my fucking anthem, "Live your life, leave me alone!"